Monday again.. Sian...DUn feel like working again... Cuz I'm now God damn stress.. Stress until Yesterday I couldn't sleep..... Kept surf net look for information....

yesterday FIL was having Fists again.. And back to SGH.... That was the 1st time I saw FIL having fists.... Is really really scary.... Scary until I cry non stop... until I was abit stone... And yesterday itself he had 5 times of fists... OMG! so worrying loh! Doctor said his tumour was swollen... Maybe because it's swollen, it may be affected his nerves thus keep having fists... Doctor going to change him a new medicine to take control of his fists.. Hopefully all this bad thing will go away from my FIL soon!!

And we also went to pick a date for our wedding.... All the dates are bad... Except a few of them which is either Tuesday OR Wednesday, NO MORE LIAO! I was God damn sian when i heard it's weekday loh... I Had in mind of who to invite and it's about 4 tables... Den now suddenly say weekday, i think my friend maybe 1 or 2 tables only... -_-" And I think my wedding is Gonna be bored and I'm reli afraid it will be nightmare!!

Now everything is Nightmare and such a Headache for me...
(Bridal Studio) We havent go around and see yet.
(My 21st Birthday) My Birthday Cake not yet order....
(Job) Must go n find my Job immediately after my Chalet, But I guess I'll Get a part time job, as our wedding will be in about 3 months time only... So I dun think it's easy to get a permanate job as I need to do alot of wedding preparation... Now den I understand wedding is such a headache!!

And I started to felt so stress up, until I have a real small bowl of porridge for my lunch, and yet , I couldn't finished it all.... Guess I dun nit to go do excerise etc liao... i sure will thin down "Automatically"

Argh!!

And what's worst is from the start of the whole preparation I already can sense I'll be a ugly, Cheap and unhappy bride... I noe we are reli budget... but I doubt no one understand wad i felt or wad I want.... What to do? I have no place to say anything cuz I'm not the one to call the shot.

Afterall, which gers dun wish to have happy and fairytale like wedding, pretty photos... pretty and idea Gowns???

And this morning my manager try to ask me stay... And I reli did reconsider leh, cuz thinking maybe after my wedding to leave mah... but end up i heard fom all of my colleagues saying that bitch she's quitting too! No wonder lah, Bitch quit den ask me stay... And I sure dun wan to stay loh...

I'm so Vexed, fed up, sad, God damn emo towards EVERYTHING!! I'm afraid my depression will be back again...